Improving the most important relationship we have.

Why do we treat ourselves as if we are one? We are not one. We have always been composed of 2 parts. The inner self, the outer self. The ego, the unconscious. The mind, the body. The teller, the doer. 

Have you ever been driving a route you’ve driven a hundred times before and noticed you blinked and 20 minutes have gone by, and you are now at your destination? You don’t remember stopping for the red lights or stop signs. You don’t remember using your turn signal. All you know is that you’ve arrived at your destination and that you have no recollection of how you got there.

That is because at that moment you’re two selves we’re perfectly separated. The unconscious body perfectly executed the drive it had done 100 times before. While the inner self, the ego, the mind, was occupied with thought. 

If you still don’t believe me, listen to Timothy Gallwey describe the act of talking to yourself, 

“‘I am talking to myself,’ say most people. But just who is this ‘I’ and who the ‘myself’? Obviously, the ‘I’ and the ‘myself’ are separate entities, or there would be no conversation, so one could say that within each player there are two ‘selves.’ One, the ‘I,’ seems to give instructions; the other, ‘myself,’ seems to perform the action. Then ‘I’ returns with an evaluation of the action.”

We all talk to ourselves, but who is this conversation really between. What is this relationship between the I and myself? Most of us never separate the two. Most of us don’t see the relationship here, yet it is the most important relationship in our lives. 

The key to a better life is improving the relationship between the two selves. We must work on how it is we talk to ourselves. We must silence the judgment, and improve the trust between the two selves. 

Improving this one relationship will improve everything else in our lives. The moment our two selves are perfectly aligned, we can improve our work life, at-home life, and other relationships. 

Take some time today to look at your separate selves. How can the relationship be improved? 

Make it a great day or not; the choice is yours.

T